Without you
by AmelieLecter
Summary: Jac is taken in critical condition to the hospital after a crash which puts her and the baby's life in danger, how will Jonny cope as they fight for their lives, and how will he rebuild it? Janny
1. Chapter 1

**Re uploaded because I never finished and felt quite bad so im sorry about that, I didn't think it was any good so ive made a few changes and decided to co write with Danny_Evans, please review! **

Chapter 1

It was a horrible, murky Saturday morning as Jac stared out the window from her bed. She glanced over to her side to see her handsome scots bloke peacefully sleeping. She always wondered how much he loved her to put up with moody outbursts and constant mental cravings she had over the past 4 months. She looked down at her tiny bump 'just four more months' she thought… Then she realised, she had her perfect little family tucked up in her bed, something she could call her own. Before she could relish in that thought any longer Jonny stirred and unconsciously wrapped his arms around her. The perfect moment only lasted a second before…

'Jonny! Jonny! GET OFF ME I FEEL SICK! Jonny! I swear if you don't get off me I will throw up in your face!'

She raced to the toilet only just reaching it in time before she threw up the entire contents of her stomach. She then felt warm hands supporting her as she attempted to walk back to her bed.

'Jac, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to squeeze you! I know how you get'

His sympathetic voice was somehow soothing her throbbing stomach, she didn't know how much more of this she could take. Worst case scenario would be crying in front of an F1 or worse, the entire ward… The thought sent shivers down her spine as she tried to compose herself to stand up.

'Whoa! Are you sure you're ok?!'

'Im fine just leave me alone!' Jac said with a harsh tone she immediately regretted. Her eyes filled with tears, she hated that part, and not being able to control anything she said or did. Randomly crying because Jonny didn't say good bye to her on the way to work or because she forgot to buy eggs on the shopping trip.

'Hey, come on! Don't cry you big lump! We've got to get ready' He said as he rubbed her arms. Over the past few months he had learnt how to keep the ice queen happy, it wasn't so much as to make her happy but so that he could keep his life! With the extra hormonal ice queen everyone had to walk on egg shells so that she would break down sobbing or start firing some poor F1's that brought coffee on the ward. Just last week Jonny practically shoved an F1 down a flight of stairs to save them from the wrath of Jac Naylor… Surely anything is better than being screamed at by an over emotional pregnant lady with a taste for anchovies and chocolate. The thought of that just made Jonny shudder with fear. Even worse, he had to keep her extremely happy today. As he made his way downstairs he made a mental list of things to pack.

1. Anchovies

2. Chocolate

3. Anchovies

4. Rope (Handy for restraining her when coffee has been detected)

5. Tranquilisers (….Ok, maybe that was a bit too far)

'Well.. Seems like a good list as any' he mumbled to himself… He heard a big lump slowly making her way downstairs, he dread the thought of having to tell her what was happening today. For today Jonny was introducing Jac to his entire family… 'this could never end well' he thought.

**JONNY POV**

'Jac! Will you please hurry up! For god sakes we're gonna be late!' Jonny was kicking himself for believing Jac when she said she'd only be 5 minutes. He'd been stuck in the car beeping for the past 20 minutes. Suddenly the fiery red head stormed out the house in small stiletto heels.

'What the hell are you wearing those for?' he said pointing towards the heels. 'You'll break your nose!'

'Oh shut it Maconie!' Jac said stumbling towards the car. She was attempting to run which was more of a fast walk. She clambered into the car as Jonny started giggling like a school boy.

'What is it now?!' Jac was growing ever more impatient with her boyfriend's stupid antics.

'You know' Jonny started, still giggling. 'You weren't travelling any faster'

'What?' She had no clue what the man was talking about.

'You were just using more energy without actually going anywhere, frankly you look quite stupid if I'm honest' Jonny froze as he realised what he'd just said. He waited a few moments for the water works to start up. He waited a bit longer before daring to look over but there was nothing. Jac was facing away looking out of the window like she hadn't even heard him. Jonny thought this was a good time as any to pull away before she changed her mind about the whole idea. He remembered the conversation they had this morning as Jonny reminded Jac about meeting his parents. He specifically remembered the moment a plate was chucked at his head and only missed by an inch, he rubbed the back of his head keeping one hand on the wheel as he thought of how much brain damage he would've gotten if she hadn't of hit the wall instead.

A few moments had past until they reached the motor way, at this point Jonny was going mad from the awkward silence. He needed away to break the ice.

'…Jac..Jac? Do you need a pee?'…..okay maybe that wasn't the best way, he thought, mentally kicking himself in the head. Idiot. Jac mumbled a reply which he took for a no. Jonny sat for a few moments wondering what had made his baby's mother so quiet, it definitely wasn't like Jac to do that. He scrolled through his head a possibility of ideas, was she hungry or thirsty, or was she just nervous about meeting his family… Maybe she did actually need a wee. See this was the thing about women Jonny hated. It's like they speak their own language and expect you to mind read to find out what's wrong.

A few more extremely awkward moments went past until they reached a service station and Jonny realised how much he needed the toilet. The car park was nearly empty so he chose a nice central location making sure Jac didn't have to walk to far if she got out.

'Sure you don't need one? I'm not cleaning up your droppings if you wee in my car' Jonny was getting slightly worried with Jac's behaviour.

'I said I'm fine!' She replied, a bit too quickly.

'Okay, I'll leave the keys in the car' He didn't fancy the idea of leaving Jac alone. 'Call me if you need anything alright?' Jac sighed as she pulled her legs up onto the chair and buried her head in her knees.

'Jac, you promise?' He was almost begging as he leant over from the driver's seat.

'Yes, fine!' Jac was starting to get irritated at how persistent Jonny was being, she hated that part, he was only going to toilet and already was going through emergency situations.

**JAC POV**

'JONNY JUST GO!' She was seconds away from slapping him round the face as Jonny made a hasty retreat, almost falling face first as he tripped over the pavement. She watched him disappear into the giant building ahead and slowly shut her eyes taking in the silence appreciating the fact she didn't have Jonny breathing down her neck every second.

It only lasted a few seconds before she was woken by the blaring noise of a trucks horn, she shot up and immediately saw a huge truck heading straight for her. She froze. What could she do? She tried to scream but nothing came out. She could feel the little life inside her kicking almost as if he knew what was happening. She wrapped her hands around her stomach like a shield trying to protect her precious cargo but it wasn't enough, it only lasted a few seconds until the force of truck pushed her into darkness, her eyes struggling to stay open as a black fog took over her sight.

**Really bad cliff hanger but oh well we'll**** update soon as I write! Thanks for reading! Please leave a review I absolutely love them and help me write a bit faster!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Written with Daniel Evans. Please review! We'll update faster!**

**Chapter 2 **

**Jonny POV**

'How is she?' Mo yawned. She, Jonny and Sasha had been at the hospital for over 6 hours with no news.

Jonny stumbled into the waiting room with dark circles under his eyes. Mo could only guess what he'd been going through.

He'd been crying... It can't be good news.

'The nurses don't think she'll make it through the night'

'Jonny, I'm so-'

'Don't Mo, please just don't'

They sat in silence for what felt like forever before a nurse walked in. Mo had been sleeping in Sacha's arms. Whilst sacha fought to hold back the tears.

'You can go in if you like' the nurse smiled sweetly. Jonny gave a small nod in return.

'Urm, I'd like to go in on my own…Please. I know you love her too but I just need some time with her. T-To say good bye.'

'Sure Jonny, take as long as you want' Sacha replied with a small smile.

XXXX

Jonny's hand lingered over the door handle.

He didn't want to see her like this. He wanted to remember her as Jac. The feisty woman who he fell in love with. Not a weak, fragile girl which she'd fought so hard not to be.

He opened the door and slowly slid inside closing the door behind him. He shut his eyes and took a deep breath, preparing himself to say good bye. Good bye, didn't seem real, it couldn't be. It wasn't time, he wasn't ready.

He stumbled towards the side of Jac's cheap hospital bed.

XXXX

'Jac?!... Jac?! …Please Jac if you can hear me... Say something!' Jonny's voice trembled as he lay over Jac's motionless body. The hospitals machines bleeped almost in sync to her short breaths.

'The nurses say sometimes patients can hear our voices sometimes... Can you hear mine?' His voice a mere whisper.

**Jonny…Jonny! Yes of course I can hear you! **

'Jac... Wake up. Please wake up. They say you haven't got long now'

**Jonny, I can't, Jonny why can't I? I can't move. Please don't go… **

'Jac, oh god, there was so much I wanted to tell you... But I guess' His voice trailed off.

**Say it Jonny please! What is it, im listening, I promise.**

'Well there's no point now is there… but still'

**I'm here Jonny, I'm here.**

'Y-you made my life so wonderful… everything was going perfect, just perfect. Our little girl was perfect.'

**Was?! What do you mean was Jonny?! Where is she? I-I can't… I can't feel her Jonny!'**

'But we only had one year together... that's not enough, that was never enough.

**Why are you crying Jonny? Tell me why you're crying... I might be able to fix it. Or throw up on it for you. Don't cry. Please?**

'I guess now it's time to say goodbye' the tears being held back finally flooded down his face. 'I love you Jac Naylor, You're more than I could've asked for, my best friend, my life. And you always will be. But now you're dying Jac… Why do have to do that?' He forced a smile. 'You've ripped my heart open… I don't know how but you've always managed to do that somehow. I don't know how I'll live without seeing your face every single day. I can't live without you... I won't.

**Jonny... I promise ill always think of you. You're my heart and I can feel it breaking. **

**I love you Jonny Maconie.**

Please don't forget to review! Also any ideas appreciated, I don't know whether im ready to kill off Jac and the baby or to keep them for a little longer!


	3. Chapter 3

**Short chapter so I can update more! Chapter written by Danny Evans.**

***Beep. Message 4***

**'Jonny? Jonny? Are you there? If you are can you pick up the phone please? It's urgent, we need you back at Holby. You, know I wouldn't ask if it wasn't urgent… what... Sacha im talking to Jonny…. Ok, I'll be there in a minute. Look Jonny please just come in, we miss you and need you right now' **

***Beep***

Jonny stared at his phone motionlessly. He hadn't left the house in a week, hadn't visited Jac for a while. How could he? He might as well try and get over her. She wasn't going to wake up he thought... He'd thought of nothing but Jac, he'd wake up every morning and roll over to find the empty space which should've been Jac.

He couldn't live without her, he wouldn't. Before Jac he never knew what love was. And his baby, he just wanted her to be ok, she had a rubbish start due to her congenital diaphragmatic hernia, why did it have to affect his baby? Why not the other 2,500 it could've gone to?! Wait… what was he thinking? He'd never wish this upon anyone!

Just being without Jac was messing up with his head, even when she wasn't there she still affected him in some stupid way.

Jonny needed to get out of the house, he couldn't stay cooped up any longer.

He repeated to himself 'Jac was going to wake up, their baby would be fine! She survived the first night so she can live through the rest'

He looked at his phone which read 10:32, damn, his shift started over 2 hours ago. He got changed into an old hoodie and jeans and jumped into the car. He arrived at Holby 20 minutes later and took the lift up to Darwin. He looked around at the now unfamiliar settings, and the awkward stares and whispers which followed. Mo was right, it was packed in there, most likely an RTC.

He walked into Jac's office which was practically untouched, like nothing ever happened.

'If only' He chuckled to himself.

He walked out towards the nurses station before being, what felt like, mugged from behind.

'JONNY! You're here!' Jonny turned around and saw Mo with a cheesy grin standing behind him. 'God I missed you so much, have you been to see Jac? Is she any better?'

'No, I... er haven't seen her for a while... Thought I'd give her some space'

'Space? Jonny, she's in a coma I don't think she's been up to much. I really don't think space is what's on her mind.'

'I know, im sorry I just can't see her at the moment… when... If she wakes up then I'll visit'

'Alright then Jonny Mac, look sorry I've gotta go, im covering a load of Jac's ops' She walked away ' bloody agency nurses never turn up on time' she mumbled to herself.

'Jonny!' Sacha shouted. 'Hey how've you been?' He pulled Jonny into one of his bear hugs. 'Yeah, um fine thanks. First day back' Jonny replied.

'Well you know where I am if you need me, don't hesitate to ask. Oh and how's Jac? Any news yet?'

'She's in a medically induced coma so they don't know when she'll wake up'

'Oh jonny im sorry, mind if I visit her after my shift?'

'Yeah sure, she'll probably like some company' Jonny knew that should've been him visiting her but what's the point, if she's not awake then she'll never know.

He huffed through the rest of his shift staring aimlessly at the clock, he just wanted to go home to bed. He planned to make himself visit Jac before the week was up, the day lasted for what felt like forever before he got into his car to go home.

He unlocked the front door and flunked onto the sofa with the TV on. It wasn't long before he felt his eyes drooping as he carried himself up to bed. At least here he could get some peace and quiet he thought. He slowly drifted away when…

***BANG! BANG! BANG!* **

Jonny jumped as the thrashing continued on his front door, he glanced at the clock, 2:33AM.

***Bang! Bang! Bang!***

'JONNY! JONNY! OPEN THE DOOR NOW'

'Whaa…' Jonny was still half asleep.

'JONNY ITS JAC OPEN THE DOOR!' Jonny raced out of bed flinging the front door open to find a panicked Mo in the pouring rain.

'It's Jac... something's happened' her face was red and panting like she'd ran here.

'God why don't you answer you're bloody phone!?' She screamed.

'Mo, What is it, what happened?!'

'She's awake. Its Jac…Jac's awake'

**Sorry it's a short chapter, I'll update soon. Please review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Short chapter so we can update more, thanks for all the reviews! We're amazed people actually read this! **

'Mo, What is it, what happened?!

'She's awake, Jac's awake'

'What, oh my god' 'Jac im coming!' He screamed out as he ran to his car. His pants practically round his ankles as he hadn't had time to put a belt on.

'Jonny wait up I ran here!' As she scrambled into the passenger seat

'What? You ran? What'd you do that for? She's probably gotten tired and gone back to sleep now you silly cow!'

'Well, I wouldn't have had to in the first place if you'd have just answered your bloody phone!'

'If you haven't noticed I've been spending the last three days worried sick about Jac and my daughter, I haven't slept for so long and dosed off. So im sorry if im a bit hard to wake!'

Jonny, at this point, was getting extremely agitated with Mo.

'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap' Jonny murmured.

'Its fine, now come and put your foot down!'

They arrived at the hospital in record time, luckily there was no traffic because, at 3am, they knew no one would be on the road.

Jonny raced out of the car and dashed up to intensive care. He ran at full speed towards Jac's room before finding her being surrounded by doctors and nurses.

'Mr Maconie?' A nurse called. 'Please wait!' Jonny turned to look at her impatiently jumping on one foot eager to get away. 'She's just woken up. This is when we know of any other damage so please brace yourself, she may not remember what happened.

'Fine, but please can I go now' Jonny practically shouted. He wanted to see Jac. Now. The nurse nodded and Jonny sprinted the rest of the way to the room.

'What is it? What's happened? Is she awake, Jac can you hear me? Jonny shouted as he pushed through the crowd.

'Mr Maconie, Miss Naylor has just come out of a coma, please try and stay calm, we don't want to scare her'

'Don't want to scare her? SHE'S BEEN IN A CAR ACCIDENT YOU IDIOT, OF COURSE SHE'S SCARED!' Jonny screamed.

'J-Jonny… Jonny, is that… is that you?' Jac tiny voice whispered.

'Jac? Jac, its ok! I'm here, im right here'

'P-please don't… don't go'

'I promise im not going anywhere'

**Pretty please review! We love them!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry this chapter is rushing through a bit. We just really want Jac out of the hospital so we can write some happier stories :) Bit depressed with writing about death all the time. Enjoy! P.s really sorry for any medical errors, we aren't doctors! :p**

Sacha had just heard the news as he finished his shift and rushed up to Jac's room. His head racing with all the worst scenarios filling his head. He opened the door and breathed a well needed sigh of relief as he saw what he thought was the cutest sight in the whole world.

Jonny and Jac were both lying asleep on the bed. Jac's head snuggled into Jonny's neck with his hands wrapped around him. Jonny had one hand under her back cradling her head and the other resting gently on her bump. Sacha's smile grew larger with every second he watched.

Sacha could stare at the perfect little couple forever and gave a small chuckle, unfortunately that was enough to wake the sleeping Jonny.

'oh… hey sacha! Sorry, how long have you been there? Jonny said quietly, still trying to adjust to the light.

'No, no! Not very long! Please don't get up just for me, you too seem very comfy!'

'Yeah, well I haven't had the guts to leave this stroppy cow alone. I never realised how much I missed her…it's all been too quiet without her and pumpkin here' Jonny smiled.

'Pumpkin?'

'Yeah our little trooper!' Jonny smiled, his hand still resting on the bump.

'Well, I just came to see how you two were, do you need anything?'

'Nah' Jonny said still staring at Jac with a wide smile on his face. 'I think we're fine for now'

'Alright then, please tell Jac I came round!'

'Will do! Thanks for coming!'

'Anytime…' He paused, not really knowing what to do now. 'Guess I'll be off, see you both later' he smiled and quickly retreated.

Jonny glanced back down to Jac still peacefully sleeping, he couldn't ever let her go again. Even if that meant chaining her to a pole and restraining her with handcuffs. He HAD to keep his two girls safe.

They slept for the whole day with only Jonny waking when the nurses did there obs on Jac. He couldn't wait for them to be home, just the three of them.

X X X

2 weeks later and Jac was finally ready to come home, their baby was relatively alright and were told they must come back at any sign of bleeding and had to have scans every 2 weeks to check Pumpkin was okay.

Pumpkin was nearly 24 weeks old, Jac had chosen for an elective C-section because of the risk of the CDH and crash when she was 38 weeks.

Jonny had always wondered which was worse: having someone you loved suddenly ripped from your life without a chance to say good bye. Or knowing death was inevitable and having to watch them slowly disappear in front of you.

3 weeks ago this was all that was on Jonny's mind, but now, as he turned to look at Jac, he realised they'd been given another chance, a second chance and he wasn't going to waste that.

As soon as they got home Jonny carried Jac up to their room and snuggled up next to her on the bed. He then sat against the head board and reached over his desk for a piece of paper and pencil. He quickly scribbled down the measurement of their baby's bedroom.

He'd envisioned a pink palace covered in glitter and fairies with her name in a beautiful font stuck on the wall just on top of the bed.

…wait… name…he and Jac hadn't even thought of a name!

'Jac…Jac?' He whispered. Gently nudging her elbow.

'hmm? What is it?' She moaned.

'Pumpkin needs a name!'

'What, now?'

'Yes now!'

'She has a name' She whined.

'Really… what?' Jonny asked, genuinely confused.

'Pumpkin' Jac replied. 'Her names pumpkin, now will you please let me sleep!' She rolled over on her other side and hugged her pillow.

'Jac! Seriously she needs a name! We cannot call her pumpkin for the rest of her life! She'd hate us before she was even born' Jonny huffed.

'Fine' Jac replied bluntly. 'What name do you suggest?'

Jonny could see Jac was getting impatient but Pumpkin needed a name.

He paused for a moment before replying.

'What about Isla?! Or Esme?! Or even Gretel!?'

Jac jumped round and glared at him as if she was about to pounce.

'We are NOT naming our child Gretel!' She screamed. 'And isn't Esme from that twilight film you love?'

'What?! I do not like twilight!'

'Says the man who cried when that vampire thing was born!'

'Whoa, whoa, whoa. I did not cry'

Jac raised her eyebrow at Jonny.

'What?!... I didn't!' Jonny pouted crossing his arms.

'If you say so'

'Annyywayy. Back to naming Pumpkin.'

'Fine, well, Isla's not bad but not as a first name… maybe middle?'

'Alright so we know Isla's one of her names… what ones do you like?'

'Well, I've always really loved the name Amelia' Jac replied shyly.

'Amelia? Yeah I like it! Amelia Isla Naylor'

'Maconie!' She corrected a little too quickly.

'What? Really?'

'Well if you were telling the truth when I was in a coma then you'd quite rightly remember that you promised to marry me!'

'Oh…You heard that then?'

'Yep!'

'Alright then. Maconie it is! Amelia Isla Maconie' He repeated the name in his head smiling brightly.

'It's perfect' Jonny whispered.

**Long chapter! Yay! Please review! We love them soo much!**


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